the girl at the car dealership

I'm posting today to report a major win the in the friendship hunt! I've been posting about the book MWF seeking BFF, and in my last post, I wrote about how to find friends.

Number 3 on that list was to introduce yourself to that girl at the [insert public place here]. I also admitted that I had never actually done that, but I did it last night!

I went to get an oil change (on a Friday night, glamorous, I know) and the girl at the desk in the waiting area seemed like she was probably about my age. At first, I sat in a chair reading, not expecting to have any conversations.

After awhile, she asked me what book I was reading (Bride for a Night, just something I grabbed from the library because it was available), and continued to talk to me from there. Instead of just going back to my book, we had a good conversation about working with kids (we both coach sports teams), customer service experiences, what her boyfriend does, and where we grew up.

When my car was done and I went to pay, I worked up some courage and dug one of my business cards out of my wallet. (They had to come in handy sometime, right?) I wrote my personal e-mail address on it and told her if she ever wanted to hang out to e-mail me. She seemed a little surprised, but pretty receptive. 

So, if she e-mails, she e-mails. If she doesn't, she doesn't. There was nothing to lose by throwing it out there, and I'm very proud of myself.

I'll keep you posted if I hear from her!

meeting friends

It was pointed out to me that in my post about the book MWF seeking BFF, I listed that I had learned two things from the book, and the first one was to make friends, you have to meet people.

I skipped this one as I was writing, moving right along to talk about how friends are expensive. But, I did want to come back to this idea!

Some of the things that Rachel Bertsche, the author of MWF seeking BFF, did in the book to meet people are, by themselves, expensive.

She talked about how she attended a yoga class, for example. Although I think a yoga or fitness class would be really fun, I don't have the budget for that at the moment. She also tried websites that are similar to a dating website, but for friends, which would also cost money.

However, here's a list of things that you can do for (almost if not) free to meet people, some from the book, some not.

1. Join a club (running, painting, etc)
     You can find groups of people doing various outings at meetup.com. I've used this website a couple times, going to a couple meetups. Be forewarned, though, a lot of the meetups have a fee. Sometimes the fee is $2, sometimes it's upwards of $10, $30, $50. Most groups charge a little something, since there is a fee to own a group on the site.
2. Join a church group
     I have recently joined a book study through my church, open to 20-something ladies. I've met a really cool group of girls and enjoy our weekly meetings! (My church also does groups of people that run, or hike, and lots of other activities)
3. Introduce yourself to that girl at the gym/grocery store/clothing store/park/restaurant
     This one is a little scary, I know, but it's all about putting yourself out there. In the book, the author went on friend dates with girls she met in almost all those places. The worst that can happen is he or she is completely not interested, and you never see him or her again. (I have to admit, I have not done this one...still a little chicken!)
4. Bond with work friends
     The people you work with are the people you see the most, so you have to be careful with this one. Even though they may turn into friends, they will still be your colleagues. That being said, I have a pretty regular game night with a group of friends from work, and it's going just fine. :)
5. Get a second job
      This seems counter-intuitive, but if you get a second job doing something that you love, you will meet other people who most likely share that interest. I have a second job coaching cheerleading, and although I wouldn't call my fellow coaches really close friends, I enjoy spending time with them a couple nights a week, and it is pretty social.

How else do you meet people?

(new) friends are expensive

In my last post, I introduced a book that I read called "MWF seeking BFF" and gave a couple key points that I took from the book. One of these points was that friend-making is expensive!

Think about it. When you first meet a friend, you're not sure what he/she likes, where they live, or anything too personal about them. (I'm not saying this is bad, I like the comfort that comes from knowing that my new friends have no idea where I live or how I like my eggs.) But, it means that it's more comfortable to meet new friends for dinner, movies, etc.

Now, one dinner, the occasional movie, not too expensive. But, when you are making an effort to go out with as many potential friends as possible, the expenses can really add up!

And when you're on a budget, spending a lot of money to go out with friends is not exactly an option.

MWF seeking BFF

 

Source: mwfseekingbff.com

I recently stumbled across this book, and the byline was so intriguing I had to read it! "My yearlong search for a new best friend" It seems to describe what I've been trying to do!

Since moving to Colorado, I've had a few stages of feelings about friendships. At first, I thought that I would keep all my Illinois friendships, and probably make a few friends here, and that would be good enough. After being here for a year or so, I began to realize that while keeping my friends in Illinois was definitely something I wanted, it wasn't the same as having friends to call for coffee or to see the latest chick flick.

The book talks about a lot of different things, and is really informative as well as entertaining. Two things in particular jumped out to me:

1. To make friends, you have to meet people.

2. Friend-making is expensive.

Let's try to make a list of things we can do with friends that are no/low cost!